Sunday, July 18, 2010

Sleepy and feeling lazy today.

Got next to no sleep last night but after a two hour nap I am up and about. Mark and I talked about trying to go somewhere today but I think the last few days have caught up with me. I am not feeling bad exactly, just worn out and a little achy. Had lots of fun at Lorah's Bday party yesterday though all the noise and the sun coupled with a trip to the still under construction BX did me in. I came home and napped for a few hours which probably explains why I couldn't go to bed last night. The water really does seem to be helping and I stopped taking my tramazadone and indocin since I never really felt like they did anything anyway. I am going to see my therapist on the 20th and talk to her about the way Dr Bowes, yeah, I said his name, he's lucky I didn't just say "the prick", talked to me and how unprofessional I felt his attitude was. Maybe see what her perspective is and if she feels like it would be a good idea to file a formal complaint. We are still waiting on orders, Mark just ran downstairs to check but I am not hopeful. If they aren't there yet then we have to wait until Tuesday to check again. I really am starting to feel like we will be here forever. As horrible as it is to admit I don't even care about all the things I still want to see and do. I just want to get home, see family, get settled at our new base and hopefully buy a house. As much as the regimen I am on has made me feel better it hasn't been a cure all and I am afraid Mark is still looking for that magic thing that is going to fix everything and I still think this is gonna take some time and review from medical staff that actually have some experience with my concerns.
You know, on a side note, I took forever to sign up for Facebook or Myspace because it seemed so self involved and narcissistic. Then I finally did and I love it. Getting to talk to people I went to high school with, staying in close contact with family and friends that are far away. It's fun and it is nice to be able to celebrate or be pissed about something that happens to someone that doesn't live here. Same with blogging. I thought,"who wants to read about your pathetic life?" Then I started doing it and has actually turned out to be very cathartic. It really has helped me to sit down everyday and form my thoughts and then reading back on them see how I have done well in some areas and how I might need to take a different tack in others

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